Why is there a cooler on the table with all her pretty things, you ask?
to hold a cake shaped like a liver, ready for transplant!
Tuesday morning began with a scheduled appointment in Cardiology at PCMC. No big, sometimes sick kids have to be at the hospital on their birthdays among other holidays and special occasions-it's just part of the deal. We didn't expect to be there for long...then I'd have the day to finish her shopping for a MUCH to be celebrated 1st birthday.
I'd planned something a bit more intimate than Jonah's 1st birthday, mostly to avoid germs- but it just felt appropriate for it to be celebrated more privately with NaNa, PaPa, Grandma, Grandpa, Jonesy and Daddy.
While we were at the hospital we felt like London's tummy had looked bigger than the day before when she'd seen Dr. Book. So we were off to the Liver Clinic after meeting with the cardiologist. Dr. Book felt like another parasentisis (big needle poked into her tummy to drain fluid) would be the best course of treatment. So....
Down to Radiology. A few hour wait...decided to kill some time and grab something to eat. I am usually very good at keeping my emotions at bay until I am alone or at least in the privacy of my own home. But this day, my baby's birthday, I found myself crying uncontrollably in the cafeteria of all places. I couldn't stop, I was sobbing. Cute James, held my hand- not needing to say anything cause he knew just how I was feeling and exactly what I was thinking. I was in the hospital exactly a year before giving birth to my sweet baby girl. What an amazing day it was. We'd had a rough 2008- lost 2 dogs that we loved like children, a grandparent, my mom had major medical problems and our company had been owed a major sum of money. BUT putting all things in perspective were so grateful to have had a healthy baby girl and to put a bad year behind us. Like I've said before it felt like a trick to find out months later that she was ill and had been since conception.
This is definitely a road we never thought we'd be on. It's always someone else's child and you feel really bad for them, but you are so grateful that it's not your own, count your blessings. It's OK-that's what I use to think too, there's nothing wrong with that... I will say it has been horrible, it has been trying but I wouldn't change it for anything, cause we wouldn't have the-Lu-we-do. We wouldn't have seen the little miracles we have or appreciate things we didn't before. We have seen the very best in people, we have felt the love of our family, our friends, our church, our neighbors and even strangers. People I've never met before have enriched our lives and become our friends. We have been the beneficiaries of such graciousness, I almost feel guilty. We have been served by so many in various ways and it warms my heart. We have literally been showered with love and kindness. It really has been whats carried me at times.
After her procedure they found there wasn't as much floating fluid as expected but rather her intestines and other tissues in her gut are very inflamed. So, they will treat that now too. After a little recovery we were able to head home just in the nick of time to a birthday party that wasn't at all how I'd pictured it to be.
Luckily our sweet moms took over and made the most delicious soup, bread and salad. My Leslie made 2 cakes for Lulu and my Aunt Becky had ordered a third. Kathryn and Julia conspired about decorations and I came home to a lovely sight for sore eyes. Banners, balloons, candles, candy and a special hat for the birthday girl. Kathryn and I think alike cause she did everything as I would have, if not better.
It was a fabulous night. Tears shed, laughs had, the Spirit close by. Happy Birthday my sweet girl, thank you for fighting, thank you for teaching us and most of all thank you for coming into our family. I love you, everyone does.
*liver cake made by Leslie Smith...look at some of her other cakes:http://clsmithfamily.blogspot.com/2009/11/cakes.html she will be "in business" the start of the year. keep her in mind for birthdays, weddings or any special occasion, if she can make a liver cake that really impressed her docs-she can do anything!
